Didja happen to know what the sexy music does to those crazy teens?

According to a new study "sexy music" of any genre triggers teen sex.

According to my calculations, so does everything else.

It's nothing new, and it's not necessarily true.

Wait.

Actually it's all true. Every last bit.

I listened to sexy music and I became a whore. I then listened to Dave Chapelle and became black and hated by comedy central. After that I listened to Stephen Colbert and became white...and FUNNY! But it didnt last long because I listened to some really depressed person, and i became depressed. Then I listened to Paris Hilton...and I became a whore again.

Then I listened to George W. and I became George W.

But don't worry I didn't kill myself.

Because I listened to my radiator. And in turn became a radiator.

Wait.

No, correction again.

I became a radiator BEFORE George W. Because listening to a radiator makes you much smarter than listening to George W.

By a very large amount.

And yes, paris hilton is better to listen to than george bush. But I'm not sure if she's better to listen to than the radiator. I'll have to fix that later on.

Now, this study is true in certain respects. But do they really believe that if you take away the "sexy music" there will be very little sex?

NO! Everything is hormones!

However, it's all different for all different people.

I am the most vacant easily obstructed coreless sheep in the entire world.

I have no personality of my own.

Now, I'm going to pop in some "sexy music" and become a whore again.

Because this weekend was lame.

And being a whore is awesome! Right Paris?

(thats hot)


Too punchy to write anything of great value, will be back on cue tomorrow.

Have a great week everyone!