Wednesday, November 08, 2006

What's New Democrat? Woah,Woah

Democrat, Democrat, You're so thrilling and I'm so willing to side with you

...and so are many others!

Whee!

It's always a thrilling experience to know not only might the republican reign of infinite stupidity and all in all head shaking moments might be over soon...oh and yes democrats could celebrate last night as the bastard child of St. patricks day, new years eve, and superbowl Sunday...drunken happy fools, a new start,and sitting in a bar watching television for the most recent updates.

I think we should call it St. Nears Bowl Day. Or tricksevebowl.

Well actually both of those stink so let's just go with the ever popular and VERY mature

"Nah Nah! Nah Nah Republicans! Nah Nah Nah!

In other news,

That town somewhere lost in the middle of new jersey somewhere that I often complain of has been complaining about something themselves. In fact, they have so much to say they've been protesting at town meetings.

They do not want a cell tower built near them for fear of it in the future causing cancer.

Understood.

Most of these women who are protesting the arrival of the cell tower go to the tanning salon weekly.

You know that cancer free UV rays box with all the pretty blue and white lights that burn?

Heh?

Completely forgetting the fact that there is a war going on.

"What war?"

"What do you mean what war...the war in Iraq"

"Oh that, right. I don't really pay attention to that"

I have this conversation at least 4-6 times a week.

With a different person each time. It's amazing how little so much of America cares about something until it's entering their own backyard.

CANCER!

There's been enough cancer in my family for me to have a slightly jaded view over all of it. Part of it I'm sure is just a sliver of glass masking a giant fear over it.

Isn't that how it is with everything people mask? A giant issue bandaged by something very flimsy and with a large pronouncement written over it.

But honestly at this point what doesn't give you cancer? There are the obvious things you probably shouldn't do. In truth you might as well just live as best you can.

But yelling at everyone to protest a cell tower while your baking in an oven of UV goodness?

What's wrong with you!?

You look like tree bark and you're a walking punchline! I don't want to listen to you! I want to go and protest something worthwhile. Hey, I'll even hang out with those crazy PETA people at that point.

It's one of those moments where you can just see them waking up and saying

"Hmm shop at Nordstrom or protest cancer causing machines? Get my nails done or protest cancer causing machines? Work on my tan or protest cancer causing machines? Oh I know! I'll go to the tanning salon and then buy a new outfit at Nordstrom so I can protest cancer causing machines...and then since that was so much work I'll get my nails done and since THAT was so much work..I'll get a few more bottles of Prozac. By the way did you know I hate my children and my husband?"

That was a reenactment.

It has occurred.

There is a reason I often run a muck before I go to New Jersey. Happy, happy thoughts.

Now just to make sure this is obvious. I do not have an issue with people from New Jersey in general. I do tend to be bigoted against republicans...I just wonder what's in the water sometimes.

Everywhere.

Love,

Arabella

4 Comments:

Blogger Durward Discussion said...

VB - Those women and their ilk were noticed a long time ago:

Alana Allen, Anna Kendrick - The Ladies Who Lunch Lyrics


I’d like to propose a toast
Here's to the ladies who lunch--
Everybody laugh.
Lounging in their caftans
And planning a brunch
On their own behalf.

Off to the gym,
Then to a fitting,
Claiming they're fat.
And looking grim,
'Cause they've been sitting
Choosing a hat.
Does anyone still wear a hat?
I'll drink to that.

Here's to the girls who play smart--
Aren't they a gas?
Rushing to their classes
In optical art,
Wishing it would pass.

Another long exhausting day,
Another thousand dollars,
A matinee, a Pinter play,
Perhaps a piece of Mahler's.
I’ll drink to that
And one for Mahler

Here's to the girls who just watch--
Aren't they the best?
When they get depressed,
It's a bottle of Scotch,
Plus a little jest.

Another chance to disapprove,
Another brilliant zinger,
Another reason not to move,
Another vodka stinger.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I'll drink to that.

So, here's to the girls on the go--
Everybody tries.
Look into their eyes,
And you'll see what they know:
Everybody dies.

A toast to that invincible bunch,
The dinosaurs surviving the crunch.
Let's hear it for the ladies who lunch--

Everybody rise!
Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise!
Rise!

09 November, 2006  
Blogger Durward Discussion said...

VB,

Getting old and slow. :-) I just recognized your icon. Do you have this book?

Sutcliff

11 November, 2006  
Blogger Rob said...

"Most of these women who are protesting the arrival of the cell tower go to the tanning salon weekly."


Thats funny

12 November, 2006  
Blogger pissed off patricia said...

If we bring back the draft watch these women pay attention then. All at once they sure as hell will pay attention to the war. Pay attention big time.

13 November, 2006  

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